Pass the Chips, Yangblog!

I wish to thank the many new readers who have recently discovered Yangblog. Your kind comments and emails are greatly appreciated. This is why I must apologize if today's post is DISGUSTING BEYOND BELIEF. The purpose of Yangblog is to enlighten, inspire, and bring people together. Sometimes enlightenment is ugly. There is disturbing news that DOUBLE DIPPING IS GROSSER THAN WE THOUGHT!!

This could be a national disaster. Today is Superbowl Sunday which means lots of chip and lots of dip. I am hosting a party which means a new germ-filled plague could start in my living room. To prevent this, Yangblog is planning on alerting my guests to the following hazards:

1) Double dipping salsa is like drinking an entire bowl of salsa, swishing it around your mouth, and PUTTING IT BACK INTO THE BOWL. For the love of humanity, don't do it.

2) Doing the same with bean dip is similar to squeezing dip through your teeth and onto everybody else's chips. Last time I checked, nobody wants "teeth strained" hor d'oeuvres.

3) If you are having a party, there will be ONE GUY who is a caveman with the IQ of a clam. Hygiene means nothing to him. Point out that double dipping is like FRENCH KISSING every guy in the room. This is the only way to make him stop. Do not mention it is also like French kissing every girl in the room. If you do, he will triple and quadruple-dip.

4) After the shock and horror wears off, I will ask my guests to enjoy the game.

Hopefully this advice will prevent a national health crisis.

If you will excuse me, I need to label some bowls.

I just decided everybody is getting their own damn dip.