
It has come to my attention that readers are VERY CONCERNED about our eventual collision with Andromeda. Yangblog understands this concern since many plans would have to be canceled. As you know, Yangblog strives to enlighten and educate. Here is a list of things you MUST HAVE when an entire galaxy slams into Earth:
1) Football Helmet. Make sure to buy a color that complements your wardrobe. You never know what you will be wearing a billion years from now.
2) Sunscreen. Get SPF 10000 since the sun is supposed to be roughly 2000 times more luminous and 100 times larger. I'm getting SPF 10005 because I burn easily.
3) Tickets to OGLE-2005-BLG-390Lb. To our knowledge, this is the most Earth-like planet available. Make sure to get a non-connecting flight because it will take 28,000 years to get there if you travel at the speed of light. I'm no Leonard Nimoy, but that seems fast. Get motion sickness pills while you're at it.
4) Speaking of Leonard Nimoy, what's up his Full Body Project? Note to self: Never consult Leonard Nimoy for marketing advice.
5) I just realized that OGLE-2005-BLG-390Lb is in the Milky Way and will also get flattened by Andromeda. Damn you, Andromeda!!!!
6) Make sure to have enough savings. I don't know the final amount since all the stupid financial calculators refuse to compound interest for 1 billion years. If you have $100,000 dollars compounding at roughly 7 percent for 1 billion years, the amount is really really BIG. I am assuming you will need a spacesuit for the day after. You will have enough to buy the "deluxe" suit.
I hope this has been helpful and I am going to prepare NOW.
Wait a minute, it's almost 4:00.
There is a slice of cheesecake in the refrigerator calling my name.
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