Notes from Hong Kong: How Do You Say "Dork" in Cantonese?

You may be wondering why I'm posting so soon. Could it be that I feel a responsibility to keep people informed?

No.

Is it because I have nothing better to do? The answer is yes because my wife ACCIDENTALLY LOCKED ME IN A DRESSING ROOM WHILE SHE IS PERFORMING!!!!!! Her performance ends around 10:00. It is now 7:40.

The head of the theater company told me to make myself at home. I don't think this means breaking down the door. I have drunk MASSIVE amounts of water. My agent, David Goldman, told me to drink plenty of fluids while adjusting to a new time zone. Thanks David. There is no restroom in the dressing room. It is down the hallway. I have not heard a sound outside the door.

It looks like this is the end. I just wanted to say to everyone thanks for everything. It has been a wonderful life and I enjoyed the time we had together.

Oh death, where is your victory? Where is your sting?

Addendum: A young staff member just opened the door. She told me there is a button I need to press to open the door. The button is labeled, "open" in English.

Never mind.