Anybody Want Some Noodles?

Reviewing this blog, it dawned on me how little I talk about illustration. Will today be the day I talk about the dynamics changing the landscape for illustrators as the world flattens? Is today the day I offer some thoughts about how to navigate creative destruction in the world economy? Is this the day I lead others to the Promised Land? The answer is no because I have something more pressing to discuss.

My wife made an obscene amount of noodles for a party last Friday. I have no idea what the hell she was thinking. Abby asked how many bags she should make. I said three, but her girlfriend said six so she made six. The noodles were also slightly overcooked which made them sticky. Then my wife and her friend did not run the noodles through enough cold water. To make matters worse, they added sauce on the noodles, which acted like noodle CEMENT. Then this giant bowl containing a solid noodle mass was presented.

You could not get a small amount. When you put a fork into the noodles, the entire noodle block would lift onto your fork. People gave up trying to eat the noodles. Now we are stuck with this giant leftover noodle blob. Since my wife hates to waste anything, we have to use the noodles. Here were my suggestions-

-Leave the noodles in front of a neighbor's door, ring the bell, then RUN.
-Make a lovely noodle topiary.
-Use it as side impact protection in a Toyota.
-Weatherproof the apartment with the noodles. Winter comes soon enough to New York.
-We need an extra ottoman in the apartment; the noodle block is almost the perfect size.

Abby's suggestion is we EAT IT until it is gone. Since she is in charge of noodle disbursement, she wins.

Anybody want to come over for dinner?